- Reaction score
- 25
- Points
- 430
benny88 said:
Don't tell me that PETA are a bunch of Teatottlers! Just another reason not to like their fanatical ideas.
Body Shop - Not tested on animals - Not tested on me.
March 2008 CPGear Contest: War Stories
- Thread starter Mike Bobbitt
- Start date
Don't tell me that PETA are a bunch of Teatottlers! Just another reason not to like their fanatical ideas.
Body Shop - Not tested on animals - Not tested on me.
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 210
Alright, I have a story I could share. It's not exactly a "war story", but it's military related.
A couple of months ago I was in Meaford for SQ. Well it was the week before my course was to start, and I'm contacted to attend the Vimy Award's Dinner in Ottawa, as the boyfriend's date, as he has been requested to be there as a sponsored guest. So all my staff do their best to get me on leave, and on the road to Ottawa ASAP. I make it into Ottawa approximately an hour before the event is supposed to start. Well, all I have in my possession are my combats, which definitely won't do for a Black tie affair. So we make a mad dash to the mall to buy a black gown, and all the accessories. Get dressed faster than I have ever dressed for any event, and rush to the War Museum for said event.
I'm a VERY green, freshly graduated BMQ, Private at this time. We walk into a room full of people, with gold bars and crossed swords all over the place. The guest of honor was the Governor General (Her Excellency the Right Honourable Michaëlle Jean). As well as the event was attended by the Minister of National Defence (The Honourable Peter MacKay) So basically, I'm very intimidated and feeling very out of place. So we're walking around, mingling and meeting other NCM's and NCO's that were sponsored for the event. It comes time to be seated so we find our table with our sponsor and the other NCO and officer that was to be seated with us. (Our sponsor was a retired General, and a Senator) Well we sit down and the RSM of the Army (CWO Ford) is seated at the table next to us, and he comes over to meet my date, and ask him about his time in Afghanistan. This continues throughout the night, so I got to meet the Vice Chief of Defence Staff (LGen Natynczyk), who I had a nice conversation with as his daughter was graduating BMQ a few weeks later as a Med Tech, and he wanted to know how long his speech as reviewing officer should be. I of course told him to lengthen it a bit, to make their moment a little more special. (he picked up right away that I was just trying to torture a friend with a long standing period) I later met his daughter here in Borden, and she told me the speech was nice and long. ;D
Towards the end of the night, once the meal is over, we make a trip to the washroom. On our way back we get stopped by the Chief of Land Staff (LGen Leslie). He noticed my date's name and wanted to stop and talk to him about his experiences overseas. He made some small talk with me about how I was the prettiest young gal in the room, and how "this young Cpl was very lucky to have me as his date". To which my date replies "well sir, she's actually a new Pte herself. She's just up for the weekend from her SQ in Meaford". Well didn't his face just light up when he heard that! He starts telling us how he loves service couples because they go home and make "army babies". He then grabs my hand to look for a ring, which of course he didn't find. So he looks at my date and says "Well Cpl, where's her ring?" To which he jokingly replies "Uh sir, not there yet..." So LGen Leslie replies saying "Well Birks is just down the street"... and my dates eyes get huge as he hears that and says "Uh Sir, I may require a raise in order to shop there"... So LGen Leslie decides he needs to show the young Cpl how it is done, so he gets down on one knee and proceeds to take my hand and show my date how he should propose to me once he's gone shopping at Birks. Of course I am bright red, and can't stop laughing at this point. And my date is standing there dumbfounded. At this time the CWO of the Forces (CWO Lacroix) walks over to see what is going on, as it looks pretty out of the ordinary I am sure. LGen Leslie gets up, tells me that if I don't see a ring in the next few months, I am to send him an e-mail on the DIN and he'll make sure it's taken care of. Then the LGen and the CWO walk off together laughing.
I walked into this amazing affair an intimidated, very green Private. I walked out a very entertained new Private who definitely cannot forget her chain of command!
And the pic:
A couple of months ago I was in Meaford for SQ. Well it was the week before my course was to start, and I'm contacted to attend the Vimy Award's Dinner in Ottawa, as the boyfriend's date, as he has been requested to be there as a sponsored guest. So all my staff do their best to get me on leave, and on the road to Ottawa ASAP. I make it into Ottawa approximately an hour before the event is supposed to start. Well, all I have in my possession are my combats, which definitely won't do for a Black tie affair. So we make a mad dash to the mall to buy a black gown, and all the accessories. Get dressed faster than I have ever dressed for any event, and rush to the War Museum for said event.
I'm a VERY green, freshly graduated BMQ, Private at this time. We walk into a room full of people, with gold bars and crossed swords all over the place. The guest of honor was the Governor General (Her Excellency the Right Honourable Michaëlle Jean). As well as the event was attended by the Minister of National Defence (The Honourable Peter MacKay) So basically, I'm very intimidated and feeling very out of place. So we're walking around, mingling and meeting other NCM's and NCO's that were sponsored for the event. It comes time to be seated so we find our table with our sponsor and the other NCO and officer that was to be seated with us. (Our sponsor was a retired General, and a Senator) Well we sit down and the RSM of the Army (CWO Ford) is seated at the table next to us, and he comes over to meet my date, and ask him about his time in Afghanistan. This continues throughout the night, so I got to meet the Vice Chief of Defence Staff (LGen Natynczyk), who I had a nice conversation with as his daughter was graduating BMQ a few weeks later as a Med Tech, and he wanted to know how long his speech as reviewing officer should be. I of course told him to lengthen it a bit, to make their moment a little more special. (he picked up right away that I was just trying to torture a friend with a long standing period) I later met his daughter here in Borden, and she told me the speech was nice and long. ;D
Towards the end of the night, once the meal is over, we make a trip to the washroom. On our way back we get stopped by the Chief of Land Staff (LGen Leslie). He noticed my date's name and wanted to stop and talk to him about his experiences overseas. He made some small talk with me about how I was the prettiest young gal in the room, and how "this young Cpl was very lucky to have me as his date". To which my date replies "well sir, she's actually a new Pte herself. She's just up for the weekend from her SQ in Meaford". Well didn't his face just light up when he heard that! He starts telling us how he loves service couples because they go home and make "army babies". He then grabs my hand to look for a ring, which of course he didn't find. So he looks at my date and says "Well Cpl, where's her ring?" To which he jokingly replies "Uh sir, not there yet..." So LGen Leslie replies saying "Well Birks is just down the street"... and my dates eyes get huge as he hears that and says "Uh Sir, I may require a raise in order to shop there"... So LGen Leslie decides he needs to show the young Cpl how it is done, so he gets down on one knee and proceeds to take my hand and show my date how he should propose to me once he's gone shopping at Birks. Of course I am bright red, and can't stop laughing at this point. And my date is standing there dumbfounded. At this time the CWO of the Forces (CWO Lacroix) walks over to see what is going on, as it looks pretty out of the ordinary I am sure. LGen Leslie gets up, tells me that if I don't see a ring in the next few months, I am to send him an e-mail on the DIN and he'll make sure it's taken care of. Then the LGen and the CWO walk off together laughing.
I walked into this amazing affair an intimidated, very green Private. I walked out a very entertained new Private who definitely cannot forget her chain of command!
And the pic:
- Reaction score
- 1
- Points
- 430
You know it's pretty hard to compete with the CLS when he is hitting on your Girlfriend...Hmmm dumb Cpl who forgot to duck or Chief of all Land Forces....Yeah not much to throw up there eh.... You all can thank me for the pay raise though LMAO
What an odd feeling to see a General Officer down on one knee breaking proposing into squads for you...oh and it was the first time I got ordered to go home and "Make Babies".....now that is an order I don't think any soldier would argue with LMAO!
What an odd feeling to see a General Officer down on one knee breaking proposing into squads for you...oh and it was the first time I got ordered to go home and "Make Babies".....now that is an order I don't think any soldier would argue with LMAO!
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 410
Alright I'll share one,maybe gotta know me to really get it...but I'll give it a go.
About three months ago we had our last regimental parade.Drill practice for about 3 days prior which always ended early afternoon with the seargent major reminding everyone to make sure our uniform's were "tickity-boo".He then went into a detailed explanation of what "ticity-boo" entailed: Make sure your accoutrement's are there,your uniform from before summer leave still fits,tighten up the parade belts, and for ****-sake's make sure your boots are shiny.
A jovial guy he was.And honestly with some of the younger members in the group, I could clearly understand why he was repeating himself.
So finally the big day came.Later report timing than normal work days,formed up ready to go at 09h00.My uniform hung in a bag in a room closed off from the animals,boots sat on a high shelf in the same room with a kiwi cloth covering them to keep dust off the shinyest boot's I've ever had.The tie was already tied after 8 attempts that didn't look tight enough for me,and sitting on the ironing board.
Now I wouldn't say I'm super organised.However I tend to lay things out and plan well ahead on these parades.The truck had been cleaned out the night before,large black garbage bag on the seat to keep my uniform from getting full of lint.
Having said all this if I didn't take all these percautions I would be the only troop on parade with a white fun coat. I own a 10 pound while cat which tends to sleep on anything I own...beret included.
So while everyone else in the regiment was sleeping in I knew due to my animal situation I had to head into my workplace early.
At 08h00 I walked into my hanger fully dressed....sort of.
Many people were already there.The SQ,SSM,most of the troop warrants and leadership.
As I walked in the op's Warrant said "morning" then he looked at my boots with a look of disgust.You could tell he was ready to jack me up,but I guess he figured my troop warrant would see me soon enough.
Now your proably thinking why would my gleaming parade boot's attract negative attention?
Another part of my ritual is the 20 foot walk from my car to work in a 27 yr old pair of parade boots.This way I can keep my nice ones on the seat next to me,and not get dust on em walking across the dirt parking lot.Now some guy's here have parade boot's that are proably senior to these that are immaculate.These however are "decommissioned" and in bad need of refit.
My cousin gave them to me about 8 years ago.Himself a warrant in the airforce had a second pair and figured a young guy like myself would need a second pair for courses etc.They were his "drive to work boots"as well.The poor girls were brown,not from dirt but from the leather actually showing through.The whole toe is wrinkled and have large cuts and abrasions in the little bit of polish left on the toe.
They came sans laces as well,which didn't matter as I follow an old warrant of mine's advice:"If your boot's ain't that great wear longer pants".So from a distance the lack of boot laces wasn't visible.
After having the Op's Wo give me that look,it got me to thinking.I could have a bit of fun before I got fully changed.
I went down to my office and began delinting my pants.Looking for the right time to spring my attack.Then I seen it.
The seargent major and quartermaster having a chat across the hanger.
Off I went.
Now something else I had forgot to say is I was "new".I just got posted back after three years away and many of the Snr NNO's I didn't know,we had gotten posted in and out at the same time or never worked together.
I could hear them discussing a couple problem children and what they were expecting from them as i approached."Perfect"I thought.
"Hey SQ"I said as I was approaching.You could see them give me the look over head to toe....however their eye's didn't leave my boot's.
"Hey SQ I was wondering if you had any laces"I said as I pulled my slightly long pants up over my boots to expose the open gaps in my boots where laces should be."The SQ went from red with anger to a look of disbelief."
"Yes...I...ahhh...do at the shop."Still fixated on my foot covers.
The seargent major is still staring in disbelief as well.I have known him for years,and he knew this want the typical me.
"Just kidding"I said. "Those are my boots over there" I said pointing back to a table.And laughed walking away.
They didn't say anything...and just watched me walk away.
About five minutes later they came up to the table where I was, the seargent major was laughing and the SQ finally had the colour back in his face.
"Now those are a bit better"the SQ said pointing at my gleaming boots on my feet."Honestly I didn't know what to say earlier"he said."Here I was looking at the worst parade boot's in NATO and then you were asking If I had laces."
"Pretty good one" he said as the walked away.The Seargent major still smiling/laughing.
Later on the pre parade inspection the seargent major asked me if I had given my boot's I had on earlier to a certain young guy.
Laughing I said "No sir"
About three months ago we had our last regimental parade.Drill practice for about 3 days prior which always ended early afternoon with the seargent major reminding everyone to make sure our uniform's were "tickity-boo".He then went into a detailed explanation of what "ticity-boo" entailed: Make sure your accoutrement's are there,your uniform from before summer leave still fits,tighten up the parade belts, and for ****-sake's make sure your boots are shiny.
A jovial guy he was.And honestly with some of the younger members in the group, I could clearly understand why he was repeating himself.
So finally the big day came.Later report timing than normal work days,formed up ready to go at 09h00.My uniform hung in a bag in a room closed off from the animals,boots sat on a high shelf in the same room with a kiwi cloth covering them to keep dust off the shinyest boot's I've ever had.The tie was already tied after 8 attempts that didn't look tight enough for me,and sitting on the ironing board.
Now I wouldn't say I'm super organised.However I tend to lay things out and plan well ahead on these parades.The truck had been cleaned out the night before,large black garbage bag on the seat to keep my uniform from getting full of lint.
Having said all this if I didn't take all these percautions I would be the only troop on parade with a white fun coat. I own a 10 pound while cat which tends to sleep on anything I own...beret included.
So while everyone else in the regiment was sleeping in I knew due to my animal situation I had to head into my workplace early.
At 08h00 I walked into my hanger fully dressed....sort of.
Many people were already there.The SQ,SSM,most of the troop warrants and leadership.
As I walked in the op's Warrant said "morning" then he looked at my boots with a look of disgust.You could tell he was ready to jack me up,but I guess he figured my troop warrant would see me soon enough.
Now your proably thinking why would my gleaming parade boot's attract negative attention?
Another part of my ritual is the 20 foot walk from my car to work in a 27 yr old pair of parade boots.This way I can keep my nice ones on the seat next to me,and not get dust on em walking across the dirt parking lot.Now some guy's here have parade boot's that are proably senior to these that are immaculate.These however are "decommissioned" and in bad need of refit.
My cousin gave them to me about 8 years ago.Himself a warrant in the airforce had a second pair and figured a young guy like myself would need a second pair for courses etc.They were his "drive to work boots"as well.The poor girls were brown,not from dirt but from the leather actually showing through.The whole toe is wrinkled and have large cuts and abrasions in the little bit of polish left on the toe.
They came sans laces as well,which didn't matter as I follow an old warrant of mine's advice:"If your boot's ain't that great wear longer pants".So from a distance the lack of boot laces wasn't visible.
After having the Op's Wo give me that look,it got me to thinking.I could have a bit of fun before I got fully changed.
I went down to my office and began delinting my pants.Looking for the right time to spring my attack.Then I seen it.
The seargent major and quartermaster having a chat across the hanger.
Off I went.
Now something else I had forgot to say is I was "new".I just got posted back after three years away and many of the Snr NNO's I didn't know,we had gotten posted in and out at the same time or never worked together.
I could hear them discussing a couple problem children and what they were expecting from them as i approached."Perfect"I thought.
"Hey SQ"I said as I was approaching.You could see them give me the look over head to toe....however their eye's didn't leave my boot's.
"Hey SQ I was wondering if you had any laces"I said as I pulled my slightly long pants up over my boots to expose the open gaps in my boots where laces should be."The SQ went from red with anger to a look of disbelief."
"Yes...I...ahhh...do at the shop."Still fixated on my foot covers.
The seargent major is still staring in disbelief as well.I have known him for years,and he knew this want the typical me.
"Just kidding"I said. "Those are my boots over there" I said pointing back to a table.And laughed walking away.
They didn't say anything...and just watched me walk away.
About five minutes later they came up to the table where I was, the seargent major was laughing and the SQ finally had the colour back in his face.
"Now those are a bit better"the SQ said pointing at my gleaming boots on my feet."Honestly I didn't know what to say earlier"he said."Here I was looking at the worst parade boot's in NATO and then you were asking If I had laces."
"Pretty good one" he said as the walked away.The Seargent major still smiling/laughing.
Later on the pre parade inspection the seargent major asked me if I had given my boot's I had on earlier to a certain young guy.
Laughing I said "No sir"
- Reaction score
- 51
- Points
- 530
Trinity said:
This sounds suspiciously like a "BFT Rucksack" horror story to me -- tripped over some dude's ruck once while warming up and sent it sailing 10 feet. Let us just say that as I ripped it apart -- I was less than amused.
My reaction actually may be cause for him to have a "horror story" of his own.
But, if you stuffed your ruck with a helium balloon (or know someone who did) -- well, that's a new one for me. Did you refill the ruck with lots of huge non-settling boulders and then keep the ballons tied off on your own ruck ... just to inhale and keep the rest of the troops amused as you continued on your merry little way (that'd be what I'd do)??
PS ... I have no war stories worthy of sharing. I'm never involved in anything remotely amusing.
- Reaction score
- 1
- Points
- 410
No war stories??? Vern, you are full of poo poo. Tell us again how you got you "Players Light" medal for heroism! :warstory:!! And you DO know someone who stuffed their ruck once... bubblewrap. I'm sure if though about it it would come to you...
- Reaction score
- 51
- Points
- 530
I know someone who got stuck in her trench once too. And you all laughed your asses off while N and I tried to pull the blob out, but ended up digging out the walls to make them wide enoguh to get her out ... and you asses ate our IMP suppers while we did so.BinRat55 said:
You'll also probably remember the time I got the shitload of extras as a Pte for sending all the other Ptes home that Friday afternoon (after all the Cpls and above had left for the Mess leaving us to work) and then telling the MCpl and the Sgt on Monday morning that it was their own damn faults nothing got done on Friday and that if they could all screw off -- so could everyone else. THAT was fun. ;D
Then, I believe, it was while performing one of those extras that the whole Coy had a parade at 1600hrs (but I was doing a message run to E1 as the duty dvr). When I got back to Bn HQ from E1 they told me to report immediately to the Coy lines ... and I drove over in my little racing jeep thinking "what the F have I done this time??", to walk in at 1645hrs and see everyone formed up on Parade and to have the OC yell at me ... "just get up here, I have waited on parade for generals and I have even waited for Colonels, But I have never waited on parade 45 minutes for a Fn Pte who's in shit to show up for her own promotion. Cpl Gibson, you will never cease to amaze me". (I saw him last month in Ottawa by the way -- he's still amazed. >
) I got 3 extras added on for that parade. What friggin OC plans a parade for a girl he has put on extras during the time she is on extras (to be served at Bn HQ!!??) and then gives her more because she went to do the extras at the expected time ?? ... besides one that was looking to give me a few more?? He was awesome. Great people.
- Reaction score
- 1
- Points
- 410
ArmyVern said:I know someone who got stuck in her trench once too. And you all laughed your asses off while N and I tried to pull the blob out, but ended up digging out the walls to make them wide enoguh to get her out ... and you asses ate our IMP suppers while we did so.
Holy F%#@ !!! I had completely forgotten about that!! That was the same ex where me and another brilliant Pte tied our hoochie to the 5 ton!! We went to ground that night, happy that you had taken the crappy shift, with green tarp over head. At some point during the ex, another "brilliant" soldier (who shall remain nameless) was told to get everyone out of their racks for a stand-to. Thinking a truck's horn would do just nicely, jumped into OUR 5 ton (remember the one we tied our hoochie to?) Proceeded to engage the engine (actually knowing that the air tanks needed to be charged for the horn to work) and forgot to engage the clutch. The 5 ton - doing exactly as it should - leaped forward about 5 feet - taking our hoochie with it!! Needless to say, we were the FIRST ones to our trench (which was right next to the one you and N widened - my partner in crime almost fell into it...) and I was left trying to explain to Clothing Stores what on EARTH happend to my ground sheet!!!
Yeah, those were good IMPs!!! Hey, what are you complaining about - I gave you the Melba Toast!!
- Reaction score
- 184
- Points
- 1,210
OK folks, the time for telling tales is over... now it's time to cast your votes for the winner!
- Reaction score
- 1
- Points
- 430
So, does recceguy win?
- Reaction score
- 184
- Points
- 1,210
Indeed he does! Congratulations recceguy!
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