I Need Your Opinion Ref: negative feed back from family

[triggerhappy]

Im starting Grade 12 soon, and really, joining the Canadian Forces is what Iv wanted to do my entire life. Im just encountering a lot of negative feed back from family, friends and my girl friend. They keep naging me to change my mind, to find a civi job and be like normal people. This frustrates me because I don't want a civi job, my whole life dream has been to become and Armoured Soldier or Infantry. My family feels that going right from High School into the Army is a bad idea, they think that I should go to College or University. Iv thought of RMC, but with an 83 average, it won't cut it. Do you guys have any advise as to how to deal with my family and friends, as well have any of you been in the same situation as me?

 

[Yrys]

REad that for a start :

Peoples Attitudes changed when stated I was joining

http://forums.army.ca/forums/threads/49100.0.html

 

[Meridian]

Im starting Grade 12 soon, and really, joining the Canadian Forces is what Iv wanted to do my entire life. Im just encountering a lot of negative feed back from family, friends and my girl friend. They keep naging me to change my mind, to find a civi job and be like normal people. This frustrates me because I don't want a civi job, my whole life dream has been to become and Armoured Soldier or Infantry. My family feels that going right from High School into the Army is a bad idea, they think that I should go to College or University. Iv thought of RMC, but with an 83 average, it won't cut it. Do you guys have any advise as to how to deal with my family and friends, as well have any of you been in the same situation as me?

I had lower than an 83 and got into RMC.  Mind you, I had significant real world leadership experience that helped overcome that.  There is always CEOTP as well.
Question is - do you want an Officer's job, or do you want an NCMs?

 

[Loachman]

It's your life, it's your decision.

Thirty-four years later, I have no regrets. If I could be seventeen again, I'd do it all over again (with a few minor variations - no need to repeat all of my dumb, usually alcohol-fuelled, stunts).

Is there a reserve unit near you? You could always try that on for size.

 

[Disenchantedsailor]

For whats its worth, I joined the reserves in high school against the objections of my mother (there was alot of fighting there and I think I finally wore her down) The day after highschool I hit the recr centre again and went reg force (to the navy from Comm Res) and now 10 years later I CEOTP's to Arty, with a 68 some odd average and 4 uni courses under my belt. I left behind a girlfriend and some angry pro-liberal anti-military friends, that was 10 years ago, faced with the same challanges I'd make the same decision.

 

[ModlrMike]

Short answer: your life, you decide.

 

[RetiredRoyal]

Family is family. Friends come and go, if they are your family, they'll love and respect you no matter what...as stated, your life, you decide.

I joined as soon as I turned 17. Mom was not happy, I'm a better man for it and Mom is extremely proud of my accomplishments in life. I could NOT have done it if I hadn't joined when I was 17. I wasn't ready for university at that time. It was the military that disciplined me, taught me study skills, mental toughness etc.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

BTW, Mom wasn't thrilled I'm re-enrolling, but she's still very proud and supportive of me. Kind of afraid I'll volunteer to go over there.

 

[triggerhappy]

Thanks guys, I have been in Cadets for 3 years, unfortunantly I quit a year ago because I didn't have enough time due to a part time job. Thanks for all the input.

 

[Greymatters]

Im just encountering a lot of negative feed back from family, friends and my girl friend. They keep naging me to change my mind, to find a civi job and be like normal people.

What specifically do they disapprove of or are negative about?  Some of us here may be able to assist with a rebuttal argument.

 

[Meridian]

My mom hated the fact that I was joining the military.  The only thing she liked was the idea of a college education. Colleagues looked at me like I was nuts to leave a well-paid job.

Now I'm doing it all over again, 5 years later, and my current salary is already above an average Captain.  Its not about the money, but unfortunately many friends like to focus on that, especially in the mid-to-late-twenties age bracket.  When I mention re-enrollment as a possibility to my mother (over the last year or so), it's been met with limited feedback.

She's proud of me, and doesn't want to be unsupportive, but certainly also doesn't want me to be in the news. Whose mom does?

 

[Yrys]

Whose mom does?

Unfortunately, some mother of suicide attack terrorists.

ADD: but that would be another thread...

 

[Greymatters]

My mom hated the fact that I was joining the military.  The only thing she liked was the idea of a college education. Colleagues looked at me like I was nuts to leave a well-paid job.

Now I'm doing it all over again, 5 years later, and my current salary is already above an average Captain.  Its not about the money, but unfortunately many friends like to focus on that, especially in the mid-to-late-twenties age bracket.   When I mention re-enrollment as a possibility to my mother (over the last year or so), it's been met with limited feedback.

She's proud of me, and doesn't want to be unsupportive, but certainly also doesn't want me to be in the news. Whose mom does?

Unfortunately it is not your mother who questions whether they are feelng satisfied with their role in the world.  Not to slag your mother, but its not her decision anymore what you want to do with your life.

 

[18-and-ready]

My parents are freaking too I support the Canadian troops in Afghanistan and they are aware but their completely against war.
Talk to them logically and learn why you want to go and let them know
make sure their heads aren't filled with bull****

*I walked into a convo with my mom and uncle consisting off .."So many Americans are dieing, thats the only reason the Canadians are there to take over where they fall."
...you gotta be kidding me... lol

And even if it all fails.. its your choice and only yours
educate yourself on what your getting into
Know why you want in
Talk to recruiters they can also provide you with a package of info

At least you'd know your doing whats good for you.

 

[Meridian]

Unfortunately it is not your mother who questions whether they are feelng satisfied with their role in the world.  Not to slag your mother, but its not her decision anymore what you want to do with your life.

Indeed, and this is what she has told me herself.  But there is a difference between being supportive/accepting unconditionally, and being wholeheartedly for something.

 

[1feral1]

and be like normal people

I thought we were normal??? Ha!

Words of advise? Your name 'triggerhappy' is not the greatest.

Triggerhappy we are NOT.

Cheers,

Wes

 

[Greymatters]

Words of advise? Your name 'triggerhappy' is not the greatest.

I was debating saying something about that, but figured the Mods would handle it. 

Looks like we will have to give Wes special 'Mod constabulary powers' of some sort...  ;D

 

[triggerhappy]

Sorry about the name guys, It definantly isn't appropriete for this type of forum, back when I created it, I was into casual paintball and got the nickname "triggerhappy" so I put it as my forum name.

Mentioned earlier by someone asking what my parents are saying...well let me tell you. I have expained to them that I have no interest in going to college or university nor investing a lot of money towards something I will not enjoy. On the other hand, I do understand that in some cases it may be benefit me down the road to get a degree, but at this point in my life there are no other jobs that interest me except the Canadian Armed Forces. Why would I waste time and money into something that I will not enjoy.

In response to my parents, they argued that they had put some money away in some education fund, and the interest had grown into a good chunk of money that could be used towards college. They said if I go right from high school into the army, all of the interest will be lost and the fund was a waste. My parents also say that joining the army is a bad choice as the living conditions are "descent" I really didn't know what to say, I have herd of the accomidations and I really couldn't care how big my apartment/"shack" is. Its not something I really care for, I get to travel the world and do something most people wouldn't get to do their entire life. I mentioned the good pension that is envolved and that some soldiers are able to retire at the age of 45-50. They stated that it may not be enough to support me after leaving the army, I was really not sure what to say as I really don't know much about pensions.

Those are just some minor things that we argued about, other's I did not want to mention as It has offended me and probably everyone on this forum.

As well, if there is a way to change my forum name, I would really like to do that. If there isn't, once this forum has been discussed enough I will change it asap.

 

[WannaBeFlyer]

Trigger,

Click once on your name. Then click on "account related settings". You can change your name there.

I'm going to partially side with your parents on the education issue. Personally, and I might be alone on this one but, if someone were going to pay for my education, and I were fresh out of high school, I would jump on the opportunity to go to school without taking a student loan.  I would then zip down to the recruiting centre and join the Reserves. Once my Degree/Diploma was over with, I would do a Component transfer to the Regs if I still felt that is where I need to be. If I absolutely had to be in the Regs, I would investigate how I might be able to get an education while I work in my dream job. (for example ROTP/CEOTP). It is not a lot of fun trying to get that piece of paper later in life; trust me on that one and it has closed a lot of doors on me. Keep in mind, you never know where life in the CF is going to take you or if it is going to work out for you at all. It might be nice to have something to fall back on. Again, just my two cents...

Good luck with your decision.

 

[Greymatters]

Well, it might be true that a CF pension cant support you after retirement, especially if you have an expensive lifestyle, but let me tell you, everytime that retirement paycheck arrives in my bank account I am grinning from ear to ear.  Nobody else in my family is collecting or ever collected retirement money at age 44.  

As for good pensions, very few of them out there can support anybody after retirement.  What matters is how you save your money during your career.  If you can own  your own house by the end of 25 years of service, then you dont need a humungous pension.

Curious about the college fund - is there really a type out there that all the interest disappears if you dont use it?  Sounds hokey to me. I recommend going with real estate next time... you always have the property deed in hand and you dont lose your 'interest' if you decide not to go to college.

Overall I think they are just afraid you are going to 'go to Afghanistan and die', which is the most common argument I hear against the CF these days.  

Edit - MikeG makes a good point - Many people come out without a degree and numerous opportunities get shut down because of it.  Going reserves while you are in university/college can meet both goals at once...

 

[WannaBeFlyer]

Overall I think they are just afraid you are going to 'go to Afghanistan and die', which is the most common argument I hear against the CF these days.  

Yep - "let someone else do it." I've heard that a few times!