You know the army is getting into your brain when...

[chrisf]

Anyone care to start a little list with me?

1. You unconsciously reach out with a lighter to burn strings off the clothing of your friends and relatives, and they scream.

2. While out shopping in the summer, you realise the pocket of your cargo shorts was undone, you quickly fix it and look about nervously.

3. You used to have nightmares about pickles, but the nightmares are becoming more and more about relish as of late.

4. You refer to your wife/girlfriend/signifigant other as niner domestic.

 

[winchable]

5.You think of the best ways to perform an attack on everyday things, such as your house or a hill.

6.You have pets...and demand that they fall in line...even the fish...especially the fish.

7.You are a moderator on this website (hehe)

 

[Slim]

8. Springing to attention whenever you hear "O‘Canada" regardless of the situation.

9.Never trust any male with hair past his ears.

10. Continuously look for good cam and concealment while performing everyday tasks.

11. Use radio voice proceedure while talking on a cell phone.

 

[pegged]

12. You wear an M1 Helmet when you play games based from WWII until the 90‘s, then you put on your Kevlar Helmet for modern day war games.

 

[Disturbance]

13. Your yelling out flanking commands and fire control orders when having a snowball fight.

14. The harder and more challenging your civilian job gets the bigger the smile on your face. And your civvie coworkers thinks its weird.

 

[Lepine]

14. You realize that driving is much better than walking, When you drive to work and you see people waiting for the bus in the cold...

- thank god i got my trucksac!!-

 

[ArmyAl]

15. teaching the dog to leopard crawl up to the objective, which is any cute furry animals that the wife likes.

16. throwing in soiled diapers to clear out the kids room

17. to me, razor wire is a better fence then home depot stuff

18. pink flimingo‘s are used as figure 11‘s

19. dressing up the kids as soliders every halloween

20. stuck in traffic and dreaming of having a tank or helicopter

21. watching people‘s face‘s when you use jargon and they don‘t have a clue what you just said but agree!

22. once you enter the woods, be it a walk with the wife, camping etc... your starting to switch into army mode

 

[Ex-Dragoon]

I did #22 for years refusing to take my wife camping. She finally "convinced" me last year to go .

 

[Danny]

#1 and #2 are the best! (and so true!)

 

[spacelord]

23. your solution to almost every problem is violence, speed, agression

 

[Pikache]

24. You say ‘say again‘ never ‘repeat‘ when asking someone to say something again.
25. You use hand signals and you and your army mates can take out entire buildings during paintball games.
26. You don‘t people who can‘t meet timing.

 

[sinblox]

27. You refer to your pets as troops. "Come on in, troop"

 

[chrisf]

28. [This one mostly applies to those of us who are student-reservists] You desperately fight the urge to subtley jab the guy asleep next to you in class.

 

[combat_medic]

28. You order pizza and ask for "one times pepperoni, two times coke, and one times hawaiian."
29. You‘re unable to lean against a wall, ever, and feel the need to correct civvies who do.
30. It feels awkward to carry anything in your right hand if your left is empty.
31. You end up walking in step with those around you, without even trying.
32. You try to redeem free beers for all the buttons you spot that are undone.

 

[mattoigta]

33.[another one for students] You say Sir or Maam after every sentence while talking to your profs
44. Unable to put hands in pockets, or if you like to , it feels like a priviledge

 

[chrisf]

45. You‘ve ever said "Pass the f*****g gravy please" in front of your 92 year old Grandmother at a family dinner, without blinking. [You know the *rest* of your family is in the army as well if she passes you the gravy, also without blinking.]

46. You‘ve ever looked through the phone book, just out of curiosity, to see if there was anyone named "Pete Bloggins".

 

[Bulvyn]

47.You chant "left! Right! Left! Right! Left! Right! Left!," in your head when walking in public.

48. You constantly tell your two kids they need to work as a unit.

49. After hearing your kid has played with your kit you notice he is wearing the helmet wrong and demand pushups.

 

[fusilier955]

50. Laugh and shake your head when you see people complain how cold the -2 degree weather is after doing a winter exercise the weekend before with the tempeture of -30 with windchill.

51. Enjoying the priceless look on their face when you tell them that you slept outside in the -30 with windchill tempetures the weekend before.

 

[Franko]

50. When driving through the coutryside you constantly think of the 5 Crew Comanders must knows:
1. Where am I
2. Where is my next position
3. Likely enemy positions
4. Obstacles en-route
5. If the panzer comes under fire I will....

51. When in grid lock in downtown Ottawa, you start murmuring crew firing drills.

Regards

 

[ArmyAl]

52. field strip any weapon that the army throws at you, but replace the shopvac bag, your scratching your head.

53. slap on a 100 pound ruck, march 25k at night in swamp water, assault something, but only if you could put that much effort going to the inlaws.

54. civi war stories and army war stories can‘t compare.