Advice for a Recruit

[guthix732]

Hello All,
I apolagize if this is in the wrong section.

Ok so first I'll explain the situation. 
My fiance is currently half done week 9.  He's gotten into a bit of trouble in the past.  Nothing major to warrent a serious incident or anything.  Mostly having his boots a little less polished then they would like and a few other smaller things.  The result has been 4 counsellings.  Now today, he was very sick and had to go to the MIR, (they go to farnham in the morning, they stayed on base for monday and tuesday).  The doctor gave him a days bedrest because he was throwing up and had dizzy spells.  Unfortunately, the staff were not sympthetic and were quite angry with him and threatened him with another counselling, one went so far as to say he didn't want him on the platoon anymore. This has made my boyfriend quite upset as he feels he is trying his best.

Now, I have followed this forum for almost 2 years, mostly reading up on experiences and advice for my own journey in cadpad.  I have found the mods as well as alot of posters to be quite helpful and knowledable. 

What I was wondering, was if anyone has gone through a bit of a harder time and had some advice. Or anyone who has been an instructor has any advice or words of encouragement I can pass onto him to help keep his head up.  I tried as best as I could, but I'm at a loss as to what to say.

Any help would be appreciated, I hate hearing him so upset.

Thank you,
A.

ps. If there are any spelling/gramatical errors, or if anything is unclear, please tell him and I will be happy to change it.
I am sure the staff are doing what they think is apporiate, please dont think I'm attacking staff or anything.

 

[MedTechStudent]

Hello there,

Seeing as I do not know your fiance, make sure you take what I'm about to say for what its worth.  Getting swiped on BMQ is not a big deal.  They are little disciplinary actions designed to make you think about the little things, and to see how and if you can take the criticism.  I was swiped 9 times on BMQ, and still finished high on my platoon with an award.  Your swipes do not matter as much as your attitude.  All the times I was swiped it was for little things that I just flat out forgot to do, an example being to bring a lock to PT class. 

This being said, mine were also for different little things every time, has your fiance been swiped for the same thing more than once?  Because if so, then that can lead to a fast track ticket out of the platoon.  Now if his attitude sucks, then that is why his staff might want him out, and I don't believe you or I can say whether it does or not because we aren't there.

What it comes down to is, if your staff want you there and think you will be just fine...they will do everything they can to keep you around.  If they want you gone, they will find a way to get you out.  Seeing as he has gotten to week 9, he should be over the "hard" stuff.  Its SUMMER there right now for crying out loud all he has left is three weeks of happy-camping-time and the Gas Hut. 

I'm sure he will be fine, and if he does get taken off the platoon, well then there are lots of others passing through.  If he really wants to go after a military career, he will take the chance to get on another platoon and finish.  This of course is just talking worst case scenario for him and he is removed.

Just do what I've sure you have been doing, be supportive and let him know that it will be over soon and he can get on with his training.  BMQ is all a game, all you have to do is play!

Good luck to both of you.

Cheers,
Kyle

 

[PMedMoe]

I have to agree with Kyle.  If someone tries their hardest, never gives up and shows a good attitude, some things can be "forgiven" to a point.  However, if a member is slack and is barely scraping by, a little trip to the MIR (regardless of whether they are really sick or not) can be a set back from the staff's point of view.

Counselling on BMQ?  Boy things have sure changed........  :nod:

 

[Kat Stevens]

We had counseling in basic.  It mainly consisted of standing with your heels together getting 2nd degree scream burns on your face from a m/Cpl foaming at the mouth.  If that didn't work, off to see the Pl WO for a repeat dose.

 

[PMedMoe]

We had counseling in basic.  It mainly consisted of standing with your heels together getting 2nd degree scream burns on your face from a m/Cpl foaming at the mouth.  If that didn't work, off to see the Pl WO for a repeat dose.

Yeah, that sounds a little more familiar. 

I was thinking more like getting a "red chit" on PLQ, which we didn't have on basic.  If you screwed up, you screwed up, and you knew it.

 

[guthix732]

Thank you kindly for your responses.  At the very least they eased my own worries.    For anyone interested, he made it to week 10 unscathed, and got a 59/64 on his drill test, so things appear to be looking up, only 25 more days til grad!  ;D

 

[Im Carl G carry me]

Getting swipes on basic is definitely not a big deal unless, as already mentioned, it's for repeat offences. 4 counsellings by week 9 is definitely not uncommon, though I was far from a model troopie and I made it through with 3...the last of which resulted in a PRB for missing a spot shaving in the field, heh. I chalked it up to a last "f--k you" from a staff member who didn't much like me.

Best advice I can give is to take what you need from it, ie don't do it again, and just let all the other stuff the NCO is going to yell at you and let it go in one and out the other.

 

[Nuggs]

If anything would have hurt him it would've been the bedrest / restrictions / MELs when everyone is on the way / in the field.

 

[MedTechStudent]

missing a spot shaving in the field

Lol mhmm, well you could have ended up like me getting full out charged for not shaving like me! 

"Pvt esti, you forgot to shave this morning tabernak!"

"...shit"

"ahhh oui....shit"

 

[Snapshot007]

I've been reading through these posts and have spoken to various people who have been to BMQ and it really all seems to come down to attitude. Seems like the instructors are there to help but on the other hand if they smell weakness they will prey on it...its easy to say its immature in one sense but on-the-other-hand who wants a wimp or some lazy oaf to rely on in  live combat?

The way I see it, its 3 months of the rest of your life...you make what you want out of it and you reap what you put into it. 

I'm certainly looking forward to it, I know I'm going to have to keep my mouth shut and not laugh at the instuctors while they are screaming at me. I know what BMQ is about, what they are essentially looking for, and I know I only get out it what I put into it.

I know what its like to get picked on and harassed, thats why I quit my last job. They found out I was joining the forces and went at me relentlessly...disgusting huh? I'm at a new job now and so far am doing quite well. It took 6 months before I threw in my towel...was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I can't believe (looking back) that I stayed there as long as I did. As much as I got hurt I also grew a lot and got stronger since leaving. The point is not to give up. 

 

[bdave]

"Pvt esti, you forgot to shave this morning tabernak!"

"...crap"

"ahhh oui....crap"

Haha.
(Shouldn't it be PTE?)

 

[MedTechStudent]

Haha.
(Shouldn't it be PTE?)

Yes, if that French Horror Show of a M/Cpl was English, but thats literally how he pronounced it. 

 

[TFLY]

Lol mhmm, well you could have ended up like me getting full out charged for not shaving like me! 

"Pvt esti, you forgot to shave this morning tabernak!"

"...crap"

"ahhh oui....crap"

;D  you did it again...I'm laughing out loud! 

 

[guthix732]

For anyone intersting in knowing, he ended up geting another 3 counsellings, totally in 6, but I'm headed over the the base for his grad parade in about an hour!  Im so proud of him!

 

[lstpierre]

For anyone intersting in knowing, he ended up geting another 3 counsellings, totally in 6, but I'm headed over the the base for his grad parade in about an hour!  Im so proud of him!

Hey that's awesome! Congratulations to you both  ;D

 

[Nesopgal]

Awesome
Grats to him!