Accepting that you can't be a soldier

[CountDC]

I recommend you pay attention to the Sgt and ignore the MCpl.  Sounds to me like he was po'd about the job and was taking it out on everyone that crossed his path.  I think he needs a refresher LQ (if he even has one).

Complete your schooling, find some things to give you experience in front of people - school clubs, cubs/scouts, etc.  There were a few of us on my basic that had trouble performing the test no matter how good we were in practice.  We had to find our own ways to deal with it as what works for one doesn't work for another.  For me anger worked in this case.  For public speaking I found the occasional joking comment muttered just loud enough to be heard helped me.

 

[MAJONES]

Loachman got it right.  Find opportunities outside the military to build self confidence then come back and try again.  Pretty much everyone faceplants at some point in thier lives.  Smart people learn from it and carry on.
Also, I'm going to go against the grain and say go ahead and get a rifle.  You can pick up a cheap rifle for ~$100.  Weapons handling is what tripped you up, so that's the best place to start re-building your self confidence. 

 

[Robert0288]

You can pick up a cheap rifle for ~$100

+ the cost of the course + the cost of storage container + cost of ammo + cost of targets + cost of potential range membership.

I would not sugjest getting a rifle unless you intend to get into shooting as a hobby or sport.  That and the fact that you can also learn bad habits.

 

[PrairieBoy]

I think I'd enjoy shooting as a hobby, and it would allow me to try to keep up some practice of the stuff I was taught at BMQ, however I think it is financially not an option right now. University has a way of taking all of your money.

I've been reminding myself, over and over again, that the recruiters thought I was good enough to let me in, and my section Sergeant, a man whose word I have a great deal of respect for, told me that I could be good. Not only that, but my course report was very positive up until the point about the weapons test. I'm not going to let the words of one Master Corporal keep me back from pursuing a career I really want.

I'm going to finish my education first. I'm doing a four year double major in History and Archaeology. I'm going to play with my rugby team as much as I can, practice my historical fencing with the club I'm starting, see the counsellor that's available at my university to work on performance anxiety, and do as much as I can with my university years. Then after I'm graduated and I have my degrees and more life experience and maturity behind me, I'll head down to CFRC Saskatoon again and see what my options are. I might become an officer, I might go enlisted, maybe I'll just end up as a very overqualified janitor, hahaha.

I won't feel satisfied until I feel that I really gave this my all, and I don't feel like I did at my BMQ. That's why I failed. And that Master Corporal was a dick who was pissed off about  the job he was assigned and was taking it out on everybody else. I'm not going to let the words of such an individual hold me back. If I give it my all and I don't make it, I can still stand tall and say that I did the best I could do.

The way I figure it: Everyone is knocked down at some point, the real men are the ones that rise again.

 

[MJP]

I'm going to finish my education first. I'm doing a four year double major in History and Archaeology.

maybe I'll just end up as a very overqualified janitor, hahaha.

Nope you will have just about the right education for a janitor with that double arts degree... :sarcasm:


All kidding aside, FWIW I think you have the right attitude, keep it up dude 

 

[Loachman]

practice my historical fencing with the club I'm starting,

www.SCA.org - there are probably quite a few people in your area doing this already.

As for the rest of your post, it looks pretty solid.

 

[PrairieBoy]

Re: Society for Creative Anachronisms: While the SCA people have a lot of fun, I'm more interested in historical European fencing in it's real practice and application as a martial art. The SCA people, in my personal experience, tend to focus on the "Creative" part of their title. There's nothing wrong with that, they have lots of fun doing what they do, but it's not really what I'm looking for. The club I'm involved with is more similar to these people: http://www.thearma.org/ Though we aren't officially associated with ARMA, our goals, emphasis and method are similar in principle to theirs. If anyone reading this is interested in historical European martial arts, I recommend checking out some ARMA materials. They've done a lot in this field.

 

[Loachman]

You will find quite a few SCA people who take their history pretty seriously, and many are in other groups as well. You may pick up a few members too. It doesn't hurt to check.

 

[PrairieBoy]

Definitely worth looking into. I'll see what I can do.

On a side note, regarding the AR-style rifle idea: How similar would one of those rifles be to a C7A2? If my financial situation changes, having a rifle to keep practicing the stuff I was taught at BMQ might be helpful. And familiarity with that style of rifle couldn't hurt.

 

[Redeye]

Definitely worth looking into. I'll see what I can do.

On a side note, regarding the AR-style rifle idea: How similar would one of those rifles be to a C7A2? If my financial situation changes, having a rifle to keep practicing the stuff I was taught at BMQ might be helpful. And familiarity with that style of rifle couldn't hurt.

Pretty similar. But it sounds like the actual drills (which are inherently simple) aren't the problem, it's a confidence issue, which you'll have to address more generally, because if the stress of a weapons test got you, then the challenges you will face on your trade courses would be much, much worse problems.

Work on it all, and when you're ready, reapply and see what happens. Disregard what that MCpl told you, it sounds like he was taking out unrelated frustrations on you.

 

[blacktriangle]

I am going to give you my honest opinion whether you want it or not. It's not the weapons handling, it's a confidence and anxiety problem. When I did my BMQ, I had issues like that with weapons handling etc. I was so worried about "messing up" that my worrying would detract from the actual drills. Fortunately, I had better MCpl's that were able to explain that to me. I moved on and passed the test the first time, and went onto other weapons on other courses.

Looking back, it was not so much an experience issue as a confidence issue. Most people on basic have never used a C7 or anything like it before. Most people on SQ etc have never seen a grenade or a machine gun. The military has a history of teaching people (many of them probably not half as bright as you) to handle weapons. The drills are all broken down, taught and re-taught. A lack of confidence and a high level of anxiety can undermine the efforts to train you though, so definitely work on that. Learn to relax etc. I know it probably sucks reading that, but I have had to learn to overcome similar issues. 

I wouldn't bother buying an AR 15 or something like that, unless you TRULY want one. Don't do it just because you think it will make you pass a course. In many positions in the CF, you hardly ever see a C7. Think about it, if you were an Inf O posted into some staff position, how often do you think you get to conduct weapons handling? Pretty much every range I have been on kicks off with a review of C7 (or whatever weapon) TOETs. This is regardless of whether you are excellent at your drills or absolute junk. But hey, if you really want to spend your money and enjoy shooting, go for it. Just remember that being able to do a drill at home with your own weapon is useless if you can't show up to work and execute it properly in front of a MCpl. Weapons handling is important, don't get me wrong. But in your career, you are going to mess up. Everyone does at some point. I have...in way bigger ways than failing a C7 handling test at basic, trust me on that. You have to be willing to mess up some times in order to learn and succeed.

I would take some time to consider what you want to do in life, and work on any personal issues you can. There is no reason to give up. You are not the first to have a setback in your career, and you won't be the last. If you really want to be an Officer in the CF, I am sure you can do it. I am sorry that it doesn't seem like you had the best backing from the CoC, but it is what it is. Maybe if in a few years time you re-join and go RegF, I will be your MCpl teaching you at basic. I wouldn't mind staying late or coming in at night to help someone, and I am sure there are more than a few instructors like that out there. You just have to bring the confidence and attitude, and I am sure you can do it dude.

Good luck.

(and Redeye has beat me to it)

 

[dannyboy41]

Perhaps I am wrong in this response, for I am not in the Canadian Forces yet:

Could he have been yelling at you because he cared? If one makes a mistake and nobody yells, it may be because they do not care. You say you performed valiantly in every test but weapons handling; that demonstrates that you do have, at least, some potential.

Open to critique.

-Dan :yellow:

 

[The Bread Guy]

Could he have been yelling at you because he cared? If one makes a mistake and nobody yells, it may be because they do not care. You say you performed valiantly in every test but weapons handling; that demonstrates that you do have, at least, some potential.

Sure, and a parent who calls his/her child a bag of s**t and treats them like dirt without dignity or explanation is probably just showing a different kind of love?

Only based on what's here, if the MCPL wanted to communicate, "you can do this if you want", he could have just said that.

 

[PrairieBoy]

Perhaps I am wrong in this response, for I am not in the Canadian Forces yet:

Could he have been yelling at you because he cared? If one makes a mistake and nobody yells, it may be because they do not care. You say you performed valiantly in every test but weapons handling; that demonstrates that you do have, at least, some potential.

Open to critique.

-Dan :yellow:

Well Dan, here's what I noticed, and you might notice this too: (though I hope your training goes great and you don't have to  )

During the actual training portions of my BMQ, it was as you expected. Yeah, we got jacked up when we made stupid mistakes, just like you'd expect. They were hard on us, but fair, just like training should be. Some days I hated them, but they were usually giving us crap for when we did something stupid or made a stupid mistake. After my training failure and after it had been decided that I was going home, all that stuff from the staff stopped for me. My course officer, all my course staff (the ones I interacted with anyways), they were all thoroughly professional and polite. The yelling and stuff ended because I was a training failure and giving me any further crap wouldn't be a constructive use of their time.

The only one who did give me crap was the Master Corporal who was probably just taking his frustration over his job out on me. From what I observed of him over the course, he was always shouting at and putting down the two Corporals who were working with him, as well as just about everyone else beneath his rank who annoyed him, which seemed to be just about everyone.

Before I left, my course officer suggested that I talk to the Chaplain about my training failure. I did, and he was very helpful and cool (like Chaplains are), and I mentioned the Master Corporal's behavior to him. He said he'd talk to some people about it, and I hope that the issue is sorted out so no other training failures or VRs have to go through that behavior. It really is unnecessary.

 

[aesop081]

Dear lord......move on already.

 

[OldSolduer]

Dear lord......move on already.

I second the motion Mr PMC

 

[LordSnow]

maybe he didn't like you, maybe he didn't like his job, Maybe he is just an ass
get over it already

 

[PrairieBoy]

I won't share the circumstances that led me to do this, but I went and got tested by a psychiatrist. I have been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome... This is why I am completely unsuitable for military service. I'm glad I was released, having someone with a disability in the Forces would just be a danger for myself and others. I'm glad I know this now, now I can really accept that military service is most definitely not an option.

 

[F3m5h3p]

What's so bad with the Asperger Sydrom? Maybe you could classifiy things and calculate other things better than anybody who's better at shooting than you...IDK.

It's hard to bury a dream. I know it is. There's alternatives. Study hard, become geniously ''different'' (as asperger syndrom is not usual) but capable. Look at RCMP requiremets or CSIS, or for engineer officer jobs in the CF.

Never quit what makes you feel alive. Be patient.

ALSO : I'm no specialist and it's only my 2 cents. Sorry if I my good intentions are giving bad results (corrected).

 

[aesop081]

IDK.

That is why the CF is not asking you. The CF asked people that know and told the OP "no".

or for engineer officer jobs in the CF.

If the person has been told that they are completely unsuitable for military service, they cannot be an engineer officer in the Cf as that would be, well, military service.

Never quit what makes you feel alive. Be patient.

Lots of parents have said to their kids "you can be anything you want as long as you put your mind to it". Sounds great but it doesn;t pass the reality test.