I guess I still have tears to shed for this:
http://www.canada.com/windsorstar/news/story.html?id=5e7e2ef8-53c3-44e1-ab69-d2f5c3b716d3
Shelley Atkinson's victim impact statement
Windsor Star
Published: Friday, November 02, 2007
I never thought I would see the day I would be standing here in a court room reading a victim impact statement but here I am standing in front of you all, reading my victim impact statement. I was given the opportunity to share with you my feelings and how this has impacted the lives of Mitchell, Nicole and myself. Before I tell you about how I feel since Nikkolas Brennan robbed us of our John, let me tell you all who John was:
First and foremost John was my soul mate, the father of Mitchell and Nicole, my best friend, my protector, my everything. John gave me purpose to get up each day, to live, love and laugh. He not only did this for me but for Mitchell, Nicole, his parents, brother Michael, his friends, his colleagues, the people who knew him and even the people who didn't. John Atkinson was not just a police officer, he was a hero. He was a hero because he made the ultimate sacrifice, but to me, to Mitchell, to Nicole he was a hero in a different sense. He was the guy who did the barbecuing, the person that would kill spiders in the bathroom, he was the one who would chase away the boogie man when Mitchell thought it was under the bed and he was the one who would kiss it all better when Nicole got a bump or a bruise and she wanted her daddy to kiss it and make the hurt go away.
Yes he was a hero. He was our hero.
On May 5, 2006 at approximately 2:05 p.m. Nikkolas Brennan pulled the trigger and ended John's life and life as we once knew it was gone forever. John and I will never walk into a room together, have our Saturday night date night. He will never come through our door again carrying Hagen Daaz ice cream and a bag of salt and vinegar chips with a big beautiful infectious smile on his face. We will never go to bed together, wake up together or make love again. We will never have our late night chats, cuddles on the couch, no more I love you's when he walked in the door or I love you's when he walked out. No more kisses that lasted forever and even our simple silence that spoke a thousand words is gone. And I'll never hear him say with pride "That's my girl" but with pride I can still say "that's MY guy." It's all gone. You (Nikkolas Brennan) took that away from us.
Because of your actions you took away what every child should have. Every child should have their daddy by their side. John will never be able to see Mitchell's football games, be able to help him with his homework, take him fishing, go camping, watch him grow up and graduate high school and university and see his son marry and have a family of his own. You took from John the chance to see Nicole sing in the choir, play with her friends, take here to her first dance at school, meet her first boyfriend, watch her fall in love and be a proud father and walk her down the aisle. You took it all away.
How do you sleep at night knowing you have changed our lives forever? We didn't ask for this. We wanted to grow old together. We wanted to be the loving family we were. We wanted all of that and you changed it and I will never forgive you for that.
No sentence in the world will be acceptable for Mitchell, no punishment will fit the crime for Nicole, and no amount of justice could possibly be served now that I am without my best friend. But you must be punished for what you have done and having you out on the street after only 17 years would place you at the same age John was when YOU took his life. Why should you have the right to walk freely when you never gave that chance to my John?
John loved his family, his friends, the people he worked with and his job. He lived for those moments with the people he loved and he died doing something he loved. He lived his life protecting his family and wanted to protect his community and make it safe from people like you.
John was a husband, a father, a son, a brother, an uncle, a God Father, a friend - a police officer. Yes, John did make the ultimate sacrifice but because of you, Mitchell, Nicole and myself will make the ultimate sacrifice every day to wake up, to laugh, to dream and to try to live without the man that we called our HERO.
SHELLEY ATKINSON
My heart and prayers go out to you and the kids, Shelley. We won't stop being here for you, and we will never forget John and what he meant to us.
